Thoughtful 1st Anniversary Gift Ideas

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Q. Since most of my parent's siblings do not live near the area is it proper to send them invitations to announce the event?

Q. Where to find all wedding anniversary types and how many years?

Q. What does each material mean?

Q. What can I do to make a 40^th Anniversary special whilst remaining inexpensive?

Q. Is there a certain colour that should be used to celebrate a 60th Anniversary?

Q. Should gifts be opened at the celebration or should they be taken home and opened later?

Q. Does the couple the party is being given for give speeches?

Q. Where would a person find a book on Wedding Etiquette?

Q. Helping a person plan an anniversary party?

Q. My problem is that I don't know exactly what our children are doing for us?

Q. Should speeches be made by both partners or by just one?

Q. When ordering a personalized gift should it have the date of marriage or the number on it?

Q. We are distant relatives. We are wondering about a gift. Do we need to take one?

Q. Please help us find the right motif colour for the 65th wedding anniversary?

Q. I am looking for information on the 75th wedding anniversary?

Q. What do you do for the 100th year Anniversary?

Q. How do I convey requests for money to the guests?

Q. According to protocol, should the children throw their parents an anniversary party?

Q. My mother hates silver! what are some optional gifts?

Q. What do you call the female and male witnesses - attendant and groomsman?

Q. If there is a complete list of anniversary gifts for every year could you send it to me?

Q. Is it okay to have the anniversary party several weeks before the actual anniversary date?

Q. Is there a traditional color for the bride of 50 years to wear?

Q. We are renewing of our vows for our 50^th anniversary, are there any do's or don'ts?

Q. If one of the children make a speech, what response should the parents make?

Q. Is it proper to have a party at a later date; in the spring or possibly summer?

Q. Who of the siblings is normally considered the "point person" for the organization?

Q. What is the proper way to ask for monetary gifts on an invitation?

Q. Would it be proper to put on the invitation RSVP or proper to enclose a response card?

Q. My mother wants to have an anniversary celebration and was told that it was not good manners to invite family?

Q. Would the children of the anniversary couple initiate a family celebration to honor their parents anniversary?

Q. I was just wondering what the 100th anniversary is?

Q. I am trying to find a list of the names of wedding anniversaries?

Q. I am looking for info on a 30^thWedding Anniversary?

Q. Since most of my parent's siblings do not live near the area is it proper to send them invitations to announce the event. I know they will not travel to it but thought they should know about the celebration of this milestone. I just don't want it to look like an invite or obligation for a gift.

A. Invitations are proper for an anniversary and should be sent out to those who you would like to attend a celebration. I assume this party has been discussed between all your brothers & sisters and thus is not a surprise if they receive an invitation. (i.e. they are also not planning an event) The invitation is to your parent's celebration and thus is an invite to attend however it does not place an obligation upon them to purchase a gift.

Q. Sir could you please inform me where to find all wedding anniversary types and how many years for each etc ruby silver gold and so on thanks

A. They are available from our web site here

Q. Hi, I'm doing a research on the wedding anniversary materials. What I'm really looking for is what each material means. Do they represent something in each year. Please email me back if you have any information about the subject, or where I can find this kind of information. Thank you.

A. I'm afraid I can't help you in your search for the meanings of the material against the Anniversary. The closest I have come to this is the suggestion that the materials are selected in the order that they would wear out. I have however never had this collaborated by any research I have carried out.

Q It will be my in laws 40th wedding anniversary. What can I do to make it special and inexpensive?

A. Try our Thoughtful Suggestions page here

Q Is there a certain colour that should be used to celebrate a 60th Anniversary?

A. We have added a page of colours for anniversary party decorations here.

Q If gifts are given at a 50th Wedding Anniversary Party (although the invitation says, No gifts), should they be opened at the celebration or should they be taken home and opened later?

A. If gifts are given at the celebration it is down to the couple if they want to open the gifts there or not, generally they are opened later however it is down to personal taste.

Q Does the couple the party is being given for give speeches?

A. With speeches it is down to the type of celebration the couple are holding, if they are having a repeat wedding breakfast then a formal speech would be expected. If they were having an informal party then an informal speech would be appropriate. Typically a speech of some type would be expected.

Q Where would a person find a book on 50th Wedding Etiquette?

A. A book on etiquette is available from our web store here.

Q I cannot tell by what is shown if the book that you are telling me about is to help a person plan an anniversary party or what you are to do at them. Since I am not planning one, it may not be what I am searching for. If you know any more about the book, please pass it on.

A. The book I refer to is one I have in my library and I have found it a useful reference. It covers both how to plan an Anniversary and etiquette, i.e. how to behave, although it does have more content on planning.

Q My problem is that I don't know exactly what our children are doing for us...we do know they are having some kind of a celebration but we do not know the particulars. SO, we want to be ready for what ever comes up and not have "egg on our face". I told them what ever they did, please state "No Gifts Please".

Q ……As far as a speech is concerned, I guess we will just play that by ear and use common sense if and when the time comes that a speech is to be made...and should it be made by both partners or by just one??? I don't know if this is going to be "fun" or not.

A. One thing to remember is it is you & your Husband’s Anniversary and hence however you choose to approach the celebration will have to be accepted by your guests. Typically, and especially after 50 years!, one of you could speak for both of you however it is acceptable for both to give a speech if you would like to. A point to note also is that as you have not planned the celebration I would expect your speech to be a “Thank you for organizing this party….etc” rather than anything further. I sense that you are worrying about this party and I am sure this is not what you children want; perhaps you could have a word with them now and tell them you are worrying they should be able to reduce your fears. Above all this is a celebration thrown on you & your Husband’s behalf and hence it should be enjoyable for yourselves. I hope you have a wonderful time and the celebration is appropriate.

Q I am trying to help my mother in law put together a 25th anniversary for my sister in law. I have one question. When ordering a personalized gift like toasting glasses for the couple should it have the date of marriage or the number 25 on it. I plan on putting their name on whatever I purchase but need the advise on their wedding date or anniversary years to be engraved. I plan on purchasing their glasses for the head table as well as guest book, serving set for the cake etc. Everything I want to buy for this anniversary has names and dates shown on them.

A. It looks like you have done a lot of planning for this celebration, I hope you and your in-laws enjoy it. With regard to your question on whether to use the wedding date or the number of years there is no prescribed etiquette however the majority of gifts state the anniversary being celebrated i.e. 25th Anniversary. I also prefer the anniversary or anniversary material (Silver in this case) as generally it is an easier talking point to any one who would see it in the future. i.e. someone will know instantly that they have been married for 25 years rather than have to work out how many years if there is a date on it.

Q We are about to attend a 50th wedding anniversary. We are distant relatives. We realize the 50th is gold. We are wondering about a gift. Do we need to take one? Does it have to be gold?

A. Firstly, does the invitation give any clue, sometimes they say no gifts or similar, if not then within your family circle when similar events go on are gifts given?, is the event formal or informal? These may help answer your question on whether they would be expected. As it is the 50th and as you stated it is the Golden Anniversary this does not mean the gift has to be Gold it is merely the symbol associated with the anniversary. Other gifts are available such as celebration glasses, personalized gifts etc. that indicate the anniversary and are not gold. Mementoes of the actually wedding are sometimes good or even a photographic history of their life since the marriage. My personal favourite especially for the major anniversaries is a bottle of fine wine or champagne bottled in the year they got married.

Q Please help us find the right motif color for the 65th wedding anniversary of our grandparents.

A. I afraid I cannot help you with your question either as I have not been able to find much details on the 65th anniversary. Most lists miss out the 65th for some reason I have yet to discover. The only list I have found which contains a material for the 65th is the Gem stone list which states Star Sapphire as the Gem Stone associated with this Anniversary.

Q I am looking for information on the stones/metals and/or colours associated with the 75th wedding anniversary.

A. The 75th Anniversary has the following materials associated against it; diamonds, diamond like stones, gold. Source; Chicago Public Library

Q What do you do for the 100th year Anniversary?

A. A 100th Wedding Anniversary is a 10 carat Diamond anniversary and I would be surprised to hear of couple achieving this feat. I assume you are talking about a company's Centenary celebration which is slightly different although it is still called a Diamond Anniversary.

Q My sisters and I are throwing my parents a 30 year anniversary party. My parents already told me that they do not want any gifts, but would prefer money. How do I convey that to the guests?

A. It is difficult to ask for money on invitations to an anniversary celebration. I assume your parents have a specific goal for asking for money such as a holiday or a specific gift. If this is the case then it is best to use this fact. i.e. on the invitation state that your parents are saving for whatever.. and a contribution towards this would be gratefully received.... or the most appropriate gift....

Q According to protocol, should the children throw their parents a party for their 50^th anniversary?

A. Typically the earlier years are organized by the couple themselves, as their children grow up then they may choose to organize a celebration for their parents. It is not expected that siblings should organize a 50th wedding anniversary and can be organized by the couple or their children. The decision on whether to have a celebration, and what type is very much a personal decision based upon the family culture that exists.

Q I am giving my parents a surprise 25th anniversary party but I have a concern regarding gifts. my mother hates silver! what are some optional gifts i could suggest?

A. I’m afraid I can’t help you much on this one, all roads seem to lead to Silver on this anniversary. I thought that the Gem list for anniversaries may show a different material however this was sterling silver. One thing you could do is recreate the era when they got married and theme gifts on that era. I make it the 70’s which would either be the Glam Rock era or early Disco!

Q We are giving our parents a 50th Anniversary and would like to know what we should call the female and male witnesses - attendant and groomsman?

A. Most references refer to them as witnesses, which is not a bad term in itself as this is mentioned right back to the birth of marriage ceremonies. If they did some other function at the wedding then these titles would also do.

Q If there is a complete list of anniversary gifts for every year could you send it to me.

A. For details of what materials are associated with each anniversary please go to this page

Q My husband's family has an annual reunion on the last Sunday in July. We would like to have a surprise 50th anniversary celebration for his parents that same weekend, as many of the guests will have to travel long distances, and we don't want them to have to travel twice. The problem is that the actual anniversary date is not until the end of September. Is it okay to have the anniversary party several weeks before the actual anniversary date?

A. I think it may be a little early to celebrate their anniversary, is it not possible to move the annual reunion to a few weeks later?. If you moved it to the actual date then I think this would be a give away to your in-laws that something was going on however if it was organized to be within 2 weeks of the actual date then this would be more appropriate.

Q Is there a traditional colour for the bride of 50 years to wear?

A. As it is the Golden Anniversary the colour is Gold, this doesn’t mean that the outfit has to be all gold you could choose just accessories or anywhere in between. One thing to remember however; is that it is your anniversary and thus etiquette allows you to decide what you want to wear and how you would like to celebrate.

Q We are trying to plan a celebration and renewing of our vows for our 50th. anniversary, are there any do's or don'ts to be consider, we were married very young, so we are not really that old; still young at heart. Are there any suggestions for this we would like to do it the proper way.

A. There is not a fixed way to have a 50th celebration and it can be up to you, the couple celebrating the anniversary, how you would like to celebrate. Even with your decision to renew your vows can be done in many ways from a low key celebration up to a re-creation of a full wedding breakfast.

Q If one of the children make a speech, what response and toasts, if any, should the parents make?

A. The replies you give to any speeches made are very dependant upon your family circle & culture; this makes this a difficult question to answer with certainty. Typically anniversary speeches follow along similar lines to a wedding celebration and thus thanking those who organized the event and for the people who turned up to join you in your celebration. One thing to bare in mind is that it is your anniversary and thus you can choose how to respond.

Q My parent's 50th wedding anniversary is coming up and I would like to have a celebration for them but the weather is unpredictable (snow!!) in February and wonder if it is proper to have a party at a later date; in the spring or possibly summer.

A. You could move the celebration to a weekend near the date or move it around other events however to move it a couple of months would take some of the gloss off the celebration.

Q Would it be proper to ask guests to contribute toward the party celebration (food and drink) and a gift for my parents?

A. This is very much down to your family's etiquette. i.e. if these types of celebrations occur in your family circle then there should be no problem in doing this. Contributing to a gift can be a very good way of ensuring that a suitable gift is given that your parents would like, this especially if you have a good idea of something they would both very much like.

Q My parents have a 50th wedding anniversary coming up. There are 4 children in the family who might be involved in the planning. Oldest, 2^nd Oldest, Third Oldest, Youngest. Who of the siblings is normally considered the "point person" for the organization?

A. Typically it would go to the person best suited to take the role on. This may depend on who could devote the time needed to organize the celebration.

Q What is the proper way to ask for monetary gifts on an invitation for my parents 40th wedding anniversary. They do not want to offend anyone by asking. How can this be placed on the invitation in a nice manner.

A. It's extremely difficult to ask for money on an invitation, most reference books on Anniversary Etiquette say that you should never ask for a monetary gift. One way I've seen round this and was successful was put on the invitation the reason for money, e.g. They are saving for a holiday of a lifetime or what ever the reason and that should you wish to contribute to this then there will be a collection box at the celebration that they can contribute. At the particular event I attended the box was placed prominently but discreetly in a corner of the room and thus you did not feel you had to contribute.

Q I am have a 50th wedding anniversary celebration for my parents in February. I will be sending out invitations for this. It will be an Open House at my parents' home starting approximately 6 pm . There will be food and beverages. Would it be proper to put on the invitation to RSVP as to how many will be attending or proper to enclose a response card as to how many will be attending? -- Even though it is an Open House event? It would help in knowing how much food to prepare.

A. As you are having an open house I think that an RSVP would be most suitable. Depending on your Social cycle it may be appropriate to put a note after the RSVP to say that it is to ensure that sufficient food is available

Q My mother wants to have an anniversary celebration and was told that it was not good manners to invite family. This cannot be correct is it?

A. I’m not sure how this idea came about but it is not true. A lot of Anniversary Celebrations are arranged by the family especially ones above the 25th. Wedding Anniversaries can take the form of a intimate celebration for just the couple right up to a full recreation of the original wedding with a blessing service in church followed by a Anniversary Breakfast.

Q Would you normally expect that it is the children of the anniversary couple who would initiate a family celebration to honour their parents 40th anniversary?

A. A lot of children do instigate an anniversary celebration however it is not expected that they should do so. As it is the couple's celebration they have the choice whether to celebrate or not and can organize their event or allow their siblings to take the lead.

Q I was just wondering what the 100th anniversary is. Any information you could provide would be helpful.

A. The 100th Wedding Anniversary is deemed a 10 Carat Diamond Anniversary, if it is a business celebration then it is just a centenary celebration.

Q I am trying to find a list of the names of wedding anniversaries and wonder if you can help me.

A. Details of all Wedding Anniversaries can be found on our web sites, this page gives you a good starting point

Q I am looking for info on a 30th Wedding Anniversary. Could you please help

A. Go here for full details of 30^th Wedding Anniversaries

If these do not answer your questions then please feel free to e-mail us and we will try to answer you question.